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sunflower breathing

this collage is an exploration of an image that came to me during an acupuncture session. my qi was low, so my acupuncturist invited me to imagine breathing in the sun and allowing its glow and strength to flow into me. as I was breathing, the image shifted: my heart was a sunflower, and I was breathing into that sunflower that was blossoming, radiant, full of light, strong, sturdy, and robust. on the exhale, that energy flowed through me to any place that needed healing, and I saw all the hands that support me with friendship, compassion, love, and gentleness surrounding and holding me.

with that healing image in mind, this collage came into being. different from the way my mind’s eye saw it, collaging helped me to discover other parts of the process. much of my practice with my body has been about allowing myself to even have a body—a physical, human body that has needs and desires. I had to accept and own this fact before I could be aware of my need for support. I knew how to stay alive physically, but I’m still learning to enjoy my physical life, to savor, and love it. and for that, I need support—support from others in the form of connection, love, healing…

I see how most of my life, my fearful heart could not allow my need for support in—I thought I was autonomous, self-sufficient, and strong, taking care of my own needs. allowing myself to need something from others has softened me and made me more vulnerable. my fearless heart is able to admit that even if I can take care of many of my needs alone, it’s not as fulfilling, enjoyable, or easy.

so, I am here—landing in my heart and body. more fearless and grounded, and thus, more awake. this path of growth and healing is not very linear. in my healing, I see how I am always becoming. I am here and this is a beginning and no beginning—it is simply here. and in my healing and growth, while I may have an end in mind, there really is no end. as long as I am alive, I am present and transforming, here—and here—and here. embracing, releasing, growing, healing, and continuously surrounded by all the support that I need for this journey.

the colors that emerged reflect a particular kind of support, too—the yellow of Joy and the green of Compassion are featured. as I continue to learn to listen to my body’s and heart’s needs, I grow my ability to be compassionate with myself and others, and more open to moments of joy.

how are you supported? what invites your heart to be open, present, and fearless? what and how are you still becoming?

My intention is to blog once a season about Life Practices in order to share what I am practicing in my life, and to suggest opportunities to join me, as well as ideas to use in your own practice.

Spring Equnox occurs midway between the longest night of the year, at Winter Solstice, and the longest day of the year, at Summer Solstice. It is called an Equinox from the Latin “equal” and “night” because (as on the Autumn Equinox) the night and day are the same length. In 2012, the Spring Equinox occurs at 12:14 am on March 20th.

Spring Equinox reminds us that Spring is on the way. (These Amaryllis from my garden are not blooming yet!) Emerging from wintertime, when we may have had a chance to regroup, to draw nourishment from our roots and rest, we are now being invited into new growth. But even in Spring, it’s not always easy to break open the shell that’s holding us back, to stretch our wings and fly. As the air and soil warms, there is an upsurge of fresh energy and vitality. And yet, even as we breathe this Spring nourishment into our being, it can challenge the comfort of our current way of living, our habits, our ways of knowing ourselves. Just as plants find their way through the soil, rocks, and detritus into the light of day, so must we, too, be willing to meet what is in our path, to experience whatever suffering is necessary to break open the shell and peek out into the light of day. In this way, we, like the earth, can become verdant and flow with new life again.

What obstacles are on your journey this Spring? What ways of being are you being asked to reconsider? What suffering must you risk as you move into the fresh, new light? You may want to write in a journal, or try a short ritual alone or with friends that could include the following:
• Light a candle, yellow or light green in color;
• Place an egg near the candle, sit in silence, and reflect on the journey from life inside this safe, contained, nourishing environment into the fresh, new, growing invitation of Spring;
• Name or make a list of the things that are difficult or that stand in the way of this transition, that may bring suffering;
• Sit quietly and breathe into your roots, into your ground, knowing that they will be there to support you;
• Continuing to breathe into this support, also breathe in the possibility of new, vital, fresh life;
• When you are ready, say thank you and blow out the candle.

After the Spring Equinox, the days continue to grow longer, until at Summer Solstice, we’ll be back to the longest day. Please plan to join us for a Summer Solstice ritual at Unity Unitarian Church this year! May you welcome and find grace in this changing of the seasons.

Katy & Amy

Singing Body Workshop and Mirabilis in Concert! I’m excited to let you know that my singing partner from out East, Amy Fradon, will be coming to St. Paul to sing with me in March for a workshop and a concert! More details below.

From a few audience members: “Thank you for an incredible evening. You really have the ability and power to bless—truly bless people with love and spirit through your song, voice, and music.” and “Your angelic voices blended so well that I was in a special odyssey of sound. I love your spiritual celtic melodic harmony of prayer ad gratitude to the Big Boss, whoever! May your work continue to lighten the hearts of many earthly souls.

The Singing Body Workshop, Friday, March 23rd and Saturday, March 24th. 7:00-9:30 Friday and 9:00-5:00 Saturday, with Katy and Amy Fradon
Join Amy and Katy to rediscover the roots and soul of your voice. This workshop is mostly experiential, including singing, sounding, mindfulness, processing time, and ritual. Anyone wishing to explore their embodied voice is welcome with no vocal experience necessary. Held at Unity Church Unitarian. $150 or $125 for Unity Members. Read more and download a flyer here.

Mirabilis in Concert, Sunday, March 25th
2:00-3:30, with Katy and Amy Fradon
Enjoy original and medieval chant and song that weaves celtic ornamentation with haunting, mystical chant and prayer. Specializing in the music of Hildegard von Bingen, a capella and simply accompanied, Katy and Amy’s purity of tone and musical depth inspires and transports. Includes some participatory singing. In the Sancturay at Unity Church Unitarian. $12 admission, $10 for Unity Members. Read more and download a flyer here

Voice Lessons with Amy Fradon, Monday-Thursday, March 19th-22nd 
Amy has been singing and performing in the US and abroad in a wide array of musical groups for the past 25 years, from the Woodstock music scene in the 80s to touring with the Broadway hit, Pumpboys and Dinettes, to recording with Alcazar Records and Shanachie Cachet, to touring as the lead female singer with the Vanaver Caravan, as well as bringing music to the corporate world with Face the Music: a team-building medium with clients including Bank of America, Aventis, Pfizer, and General Electric.

Amy assisted Kim Rosen and Cathie Malach’s self-transformation work, Interspecies Connection, with voice support and group facilitation, and completed a 3-year certification with Kim called the Delphys Training in alternative counseling and healing modalities. She has since been ordained as an Interfaith Minister with a Spiritual Counseling Certificate at The New Seminary, and has developed a large private practice teaching vocal technique and helping people to find their “voice” using voice as a vehicle for self-discovery. Read more about Amy here. Contact Katy to schedule a lesson.

Collage and Practice. I can’t really write enough about my love of collaging! No matter what my life is bringing to me, collage can help me express and find deeper meaning than the linear thoughts that I’m consciously aware of.

This collage is, again, about exploring different parts of myself. I am in the midst of some healing work that includes learning to slow down, to do less, to rest. The process of collage itself invites me to do the same. I wrote about this collage in a recent blogpost. I am deepening my understanding of Anne Dillard’s oft-quoted phrase: “The way we spend our days is, of course, the way we spend our lives.”

One of the practices thas is supporting me in learning to slow down is that I make sure I take at least one 5-minute break in the day in which I do nothing. I might sip a cup of tea, but otherwise no reading, no music, no talking…I just sit in a comfrotable place and stay with myself for at least 5 minutes. This practice is helping me to actually experience my life more, to find more delight, more connection, more meaning, more joy, more peace right in the midst of it…That is how I want to spend my life, not the way I’ve been filling my days for so long–with work and busyness and to-do lists…

How do you spend your days? Is this how you want to spend your life? What simple thing could you try on to practice dropping into the moment? 

Body/Movement. Because of this time of healing, I have been much less physically active recently. I tried at one point to start running again, but it was too soon and it absoutely exhausted me, so I decided to wait. I even had to stop going to the Belly Dancing class I was loving! I am learning to listen to what my body really needs, and she was telling me to rest. I slept 9-10 hours for almost a month on top of immune support and acupuncture! Now my body is feeling more energized and I’m waking up after 8-8.5 hours. I did my first run, only half the distance I normally would and more slowly, and I still feel good. So, slowly but surely, I hope to find my way into more conscious movement that supports my health and is attuned to my body’s needs.

How do you listen to your body’s needs? Do you exercise regularly? Can you tell what is enough and not too much? How does your body let you know, and do you listen?

Summit Hill Laughter Club! I’ve mentioned before that I trained to become a Certified Laughter Yoga leader, and now I’ve started a St. Paul Laughter Yoga Club at Unity Unitarian Church. We’re starting out with meeting one Wednesday per month. Upcoming dates are March 14, April 11th, and May 16th from 7:15-8:15, and it’s free!

Come explore the art of laughter to invite more joy, play, health, and wellbeing into your life! Because of the deep pranayamic breathing exercises and the invitation to become more whole by allowing the lighter, more playful and joyful side of yourself to come forward, this form of practice is also called Laughter Yoga; however, it does not include any physical asanas and can be practiced by people of all ages who are willing to try on being a little bit silly. Please contact me if you have any questions–I would love to laugh with you!

Reverending. I absolutely love performing ceremonies that bring more honoring of our intentions and love into the world! This above laughing picture was from a wedding I performed last year. Let me know if I can assist you in honoring any transitions or special moments in your life. You can read more about my practice of ministry.

The next seasonal celebration will be the Summer Soltice in June at Unity Unitarian church.

Spring Blessings, Katy

practice loving kindness

healing

I’ve been going through some stress-related health issues lately that have prompted me to slow down, to take on less, to listen, to ask for support, in short, to re-prioritize my life and look carefully at how I really want to be living “this one wild and precious life.” (from Mary Oliver’s Summer Day).

One aspect of this is related to the noface collage I did last Fall, an aspect of which I am exploring again here. I realize as I walk this healing path, that I don’t know, really, who I will be on the other side. I have ideas that I will be happier or freer or more able to listen to my body…but really, I don’t know who will emerge.

Like the many different faces of woman Susan Seddon Boulet’s paintings portray in this collage, I want to be open to whoever I am becoming. Maybe my sense of self doesn’t need to be static. Maybe, at any moment, I could embody any of these different faces—and others that I could never dream of.

Maybe my true face is like the yellow circle—full and empty, containing all things and nothing, radiant with potential and connected to all of life.

I want to dance this path with integrity and openness to who is emerging, not needing to know all the facets of who I am becoming.

How are you living your “one wild and precious life?” What parts of you are emerging? Do you feel open to not knowing exactly who you are becoming?

benevolence surrounding

we are
surrounded by
compassionate,
loving,
mysterious,
benevolence.

she continually
holds us,
welcomes us
invites us,
re-members us.
 

 

mary, queen of heaven,
pray for us

tara, savior of all,
dissolve our rigidity

kuan yin, goddess of compassion,
hold us in loving kindness

brigid of the hearth,
gather us

mary, the magdalene,
teach us sensual devotion

mother of the universe,
encompass us

the body is in the soul

ImageI am attracted to this phrase from John O’Donohue: “The body is in the soul.” I turned to collage to discover its meaning.

The body, my physical home, is not just a container or a vessel. She is in the soul. She lives in and as part of the soul. As such, she is not alone, not fending for herself, but held in the shelter and embrace of the soul.

The soul is alive and unbound, impressionable, full of vitality and fluidity, always responding to the moment. And yet, I often experience my body as bound—contained within the confines of my skin, held in and separate. What if my body, living in my soul, as part of my soul, were not bound up in this separate physical package? What if I could remember that these skin boundaries are actually porous and permeable, allowing energy to move in and out of me, to meet and mingle with others?

My body gives my soul a way to connect with others. She is affected by life and she is intimate with all of life. My soul knows physical life through my body—tastes it, smells it, sees it, hears it, touches it, feels it…mindful experiencing of these senses, being sensuous, is to be in the presence of my soul, and is to be embraced in Presence.

Blues and oranges are the colors that my husband and I (in that order) love and are attracted to. For many years, I thought orange was too bright, garish, overdone. As I have learned to appreciate it over the past several years, I feel that I am also embracing my own vitality and life force energy. It warms me, feels radiant with life, invites me to joy, passion, and sensuality.

Images echo how nature, like the soul, holds and embraces and tends to us. She is our home, out of which we arise and flourish, and back to which we return. These images reveal the life, the movement, the fluidity, the beauty, and also the solidity and presence of the body in the soul. Held in the embrace of the soul, my body is safe, grounded, able to drop her boundaries and dip into the water of life.

(Quote from John O’Donohue’s Anam Cara, p.53. Image of woman from Louise Beckerman, titled Waters Edge.)

My intention is to blog once a season about Life Practices in order to share what I am practicing in my life, and to suggest opportunities to join me, as well as ideas to use in your own practice.

Woodcut by Carol Zaloom

Winter Solstice occurs this year on December 21st at 11:30 pm CT. This is the first day of Winter—the shortest day and longest night of the year. Every day thereafter, the days grow longer until Summer Solstice, when we have the longest day and the shortest night.

Wintertime is the season of rest and renewal for the natural world. Plants stop growing and return to the earth, focusing their energy in their roots or in seed that lies dormant until Spring. Most animals that don’t migrate find comfort in shelter or hibernate until warmer weather. For us, as humans, it can also be a time of rest, a time of going inward to nourish our souls, a time of re-creation. However, as we head inside for the cold Minnesota Winter, it’s often the opposite—we find more and more to do. Not only are the holidays coming, but everything that was set aside over the Summer and Fall now captivates our attention.

The part of us that is in touch with the turning of the seasons yearns for this time of turning inward to nourish our roots, this time of rest. What would it mean to spend time in the darkness waiting and ready for the unknown, quiet and attentive to the unknown? What if we didn’t immediately turn to our to-do lists whenever we had a free moment, thus filling up our time with the known? What if we stopped for a moment to take in the darkening, to rest more, to respond to the invitation to slow down and nourish our souls? How might our lives be different?

Here’s a starting place for a journal exploration, or a short ritual alone or with friends:
• Begin in the dark, sitting in silence for a time, breathing in the darkness and the stillness.
• As you sit with yourself, notice your body and feelings. What arises in you? How is it to sit here quietly with nothing to do?
• When you are ready, light a single candle.
• Notice if there is a change in you with this light—keep coming back to your body and heart.
• Name out loud or in your journal what the darkness and stillness is calling forth in you. You may want to follow your body’s impulse to move or sound this experience.
• Acknowledge your gratefulness for this inward time of re-creation, and blow out the candle.

Please join me and other members of Unity Church Unitarian for a Winter Solstice Celebration at 7:00 pm in the Parish Hall on December 21st. You can find more information below. May you welcome and find grace in this changing of the seasons. 

Singing Meditation, Sunday, December 18th from 7:00-8:30 pm, with Katy and cellist, Anna Vazquez. How can you find the still point at your center in the midst of the chaos we call “holidays”? Come to the St. Paul Yoga Center to sing, meditate, and breathe with us in a peaceful, candlelit space, with warm tea for the throat, the healing sounds of cello, harmonium, chants and rounds sung in community, and the ultimate gift of your own presence.

Singing Meditation is the practice of singing simple chants and rounds from many spiritual traditions as a group and then dissolving into silence and allowing a time of quiet meditation before the next song is begun. Singing in this way can be a practice of coming home to our embodied selves as we allow the vibrations of sound to quiet our minds, open our hearts, and land us more deeply in our bodies, in the moment, physically present. All songs will be repeated many times and all are welcome (no prior singing experience necessary). Read more about Anna’s work and download a flyer. $10-$15 suggested donation.

Do you take time to sing, hum, or sound? Next time you do, notice how your body is affected by the vibrations. Also notice how your heart and mind respond.

Save the Date: In March 2012, my singing partner Amy Fradon will be joining me for a Singing Body Workshop and a Concert of my music. Read more and download a flyer

Collage gives me a really valuable way to get to know myself in a nonlinear way. I’ve been exploring aspects of myself that have typically been less a part of my self-image recently. One such aspect is the one who takes the time to look and listen inwardly, who values intuitive knowing and feminine eros, or life force energy. This exploration feels very connected to the inward time we are moving into with the shorter days and longer nights. I wrote about this collage in a recent blogpost. How do you welcome and allow other parts of yourself to come forward? How do you go inside and listen?

Body/Movement. I also had the chance to explore this theme of allowing more of myself to emerge through movement recently. I had a wonderful session with a bodyworker who helped me to include my physical experience instead of trying to push it away. So often when I notice tension or pain, I notice it, and then want to do things to get rid of it. In session, she invited me accept it, allow it, move with it—include it in my felt-experience, rather than look away or ignore it. From this process, a deeper learning emerged. Including more of myself, I feel less one-sided, more full, more whole, more here. You may want to explore a movement impulse and see where it takes you. How does it make you feel to follow it, allow it, be with it? Does it complete itself in some way?

Blessing Reed

Baby Blessing! I absolutely love performing ceremonies that bring more honoring of our intentions and love into the world! This picture is from my most recent Interfaith Baby Blessing for Reed and his family. He was totally into having blessing oil on his forehead and taste of milk on his lips as we welcomed him into his interfaith family with family and friends gathered. A Tibetan blessing for us all: May all beings moving through this world be showered and blessed with goodness and joy. Let me know if I can assist you in honoring any transitions or special moments in your life. You can read more about my practice of ministry.

Winter Solstice Celebration! Come join this contemplative, family-friendly, participatory, Celtic-inspired ritual to mark the turning of the year as the darkness gives way to the growing light. This participatory ritual will include chanting, meditation, candle-lighting, singing, and cauldron jumping. Kids, bring animal masks and hand percussion (rattles, shakers, bells)!

Please contact me if you have any questions. We’d love to have you join us!

Winter Solstice Ritual

Winter Blessings, Katy

intuitive self

she is.
she knows.
she feels, senses, is moved.
she touches inside. deep inside.
yearnings, longings, knowings.
here inside, here underneath.
trust in what is. here.
mystery. unknown.
stirring, moving, calling.
she follows, flowing after the call.
fully human, fully here, fully alive.
she touches inside. deep inside.
she feels, senses, is moved.
she knows.
she is.

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